Being hit by a woman makes me sound less of a man

But Carol hit me, not once, or twice. And at first I brushed it as spur of the moment anger. 

When it happened again, I realized things were running out of hand. 

See, am not that kind of a guy who is confrontational. Or hits back when provoked

Carol and I have been married for 7 years now. Little heaven on earth once in a while – traveling to fancy little islands, just the two of us. 

The elephant in the room? We still had no kids. We had talked about it, shelved it, gone for tests, consulted our extended family. Still nothing

Deep down, I guess, each of us felt responsible for it. Yet we never confronted each other. 

Until I once jokingly said we should each try having a side chick, just to see if things would be different

And that’s when she slapped me

Anger. Hurt. Disappointment. Jealousy

Totally understandable. And justifiable. She later apologized, profusely, made me chapati & chicken. Steamy make up sex. End of story. Or so I thought

Then it happened again. This time, I came home late without calling in advance to say I was caught up with work

Right there at the door as she opened it for me, she took one smell at my jacket and whaaap! A slap that caught me flat-footed. 

She immediately went on her knees and started crying saying, it had been a long day for her. Her hormones were running wild. She was worried about me. She didn’t want to lose me

I ended up soothing and massaging her 

But when she hit me again in front of our best friends, I snapped back. See, we had invited some friends over for dinner – to celebrate our 7th anniversary. She had also sealed a good tender, worth a couple of millions. We were finally making it. 

The slap came as a shock. We were in the kitchen with Maggie and Fred – our best couple during our wedding – and I don’t even recall what triggered it. 

Suddenly she was hovering over me – her eyes bloodshot, her tall frame over powering mine. Later I remember I had answered Fred when he has asked if I would allow my wife to add her name to the new piece of land we had just bought. And I told him No way as we both laughed it off

Suddenly the room went quiet. And I realized she was not focused on her conversation with Maggie. 

She hit me so hard I nearly screamed

And walked out before we could do anything

Our friends were so stunned they just went home right away. And I never told them about the other times

In the deep of the night, I called Fred, crying. He drove over immediately 

In the silence of the night, very few words between us, Fred watching helplessly, I packed my stuff

I could hear her crying somewhere in the corner of the bedroom

And I realized I didn’t have much. She had done more of the purchases in the home than me

I walked out, never looking back. And Fred drove me away into the wee hours of the morning

At least both of us were in one piece.

Broken, but alive